The morals of the believers are not supposed to come
into play exclusively at times of ease and convenience. In fact, true
morality self-manifests during the moments of hardship, adversity, and
crisis. Some people may seem well-mannered with a polite attitude and
bashful conduct as long as they are calm and the surrounding
circumstances are convenient and favorable. However, when they are
subjected to anger or experience hardship, unfortunate conditions, and
the like of adverse circumstances, they turn into completely different
people, far from the well-mannered people you knew! Sadly, a person (who
was once well-mannered) would turn into a bad-tempered, fierce,
verbally abusive, harsh, intimidating, and vulgar transgressor! We see
this saddening transformation quite often, and the extent to which
someone’s character can change is quite shocking. Is this how distant
Islamic morality is from our hearts and souls, due to which it fails to
change such qualities?
It was narrated on the authority of ‘Abdullah ibn Mas‘ood that the Messenger of Allah (saws) said: “A believer is neither a slanderer nor a curser, nor is he obscene or vulgar.”
[Sahih At-Tirmithi] Ibn Battaal said that ‘obscene’ means the one who
is verbally abusive and commits obscene actions. ‘Vulgar’ means
foul-mouthed [An-Nihaayah]. How could a person turn into one who fits
such a bad description denounced by the Prophet (saws) in a single
moment because of a situation or a word or a dispute!
We used to
think that foolish people are those who are poorly-educated,
ill-mannered, and have these sinful (evil) qualities. However, we were
shocked to find many people whom we thought to be educated fitting the
description as well!
Al-Qurtubi said: “A vulgar, foul-mouthed
person is described as foolish because vulgarity is only compatible with
ignorance and small-mindedness.”
Some people would argue
that their obscenity and vulgarity are justified by the fact that they
have been angered, that the situation called for it, that other people
triggered them by their misbehavior, or that calmness in such situations
is harmful and passive! There is no doubt that this is an erroneous way
of thinking that may incur evil consequences on people. The Prophet
(saws) said: “…and if a man verbally abuses you or shames you for
something in you that he knows about, do not shame him for something in
him that you know about; let him bear the evil consequences of it (his
abuse), and you receive the reward for it, so do not curse.” [Sahih At-Targheeb]
Al-Qaari said: “Obscenity and vulgarity are entirely blameworthy qualities that are unbecoming of the believers…” He added: “He
who is guided by Allah should avoid it (obscenity and vulgarity);
accustom his tongue to good, polite language; and follow the example of
the Prophets of Allah, for they are the most excellent role models.” [Mirqaat Al-Mafaateeh]
There
are also people who use foul, vulgar, and reprehensible words under the
pretext that they were commonly used by the early Arabs! Al-Mawardi
said: “What falls into the category of vulgarity and foul language in
terms of the obligation of avoiding it is all what seems disgraceful
and reprehensible, even if it may be considered good and acceptable
after search and deliberative contemplation.”
An-Nawawi said: “Scholars
said that euphemisms should be used in such situations when a person
would feel ashamed to use overt language. Accordingly, sexual
intercourse should be euphemistically referred to as engaging in
intimacy, consummation of marriage, cohabitation, and the like…
Likewise, urinating and defecating should be euphemistically referred to
as answering the call of nature or relieving oneself instead of using
overt words like urine or stool. Similarly, euphemism should be used for
the (physical) defects that people may be ashamed to express overtly,
such as leprosy, halitosis, body odor, and the like. Beautiful
euphemistic expressions that convey the intended meaning should be used
in situations like the above mentioned ones and their like. Know that
such euphemisms may be used as long as there is no need to use overt
language. If there is a need to use it for the purpose of clarification
and education and it is feared that the addressee would not understand
metaphors or would understand something different, then, in this case,
one should use overt language instead to ensure that the addressee
understands the correct meaning, and this is the rationale for using
overt language in some Ahadith. As explained above, this was to ensure
that the addressee understands the intended meaning in these contexts,
as it should be given priority over mere politeness.” [Al-Athkaar]
The
people who need adherence to morality the most are the callers to
Allah. It is unbecoming of them to act contrary to their moral
principles, and their refined morality should rather manifest in all
situations, regardless of how intense those situations are and no matter
how wicked their opponents may be. The Prophet (saws) said: “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him speak good or remain silent.”
[Sahih Al-Bukhari] These, then, are the distinct manners of the
believers. A believer should always speak good or remain silent.
Speaking good has many manifestations, and silence could be of great
benefit when no good could be spoken.
Verily,
bashfulness is at the very core of the believers’ morality and the
central moral value of Islam. Whenever a person adheres to bashfulness,
he assumes control of himself and (becomes able to) change his bad
morals. Therefore, we should be perfectly mindful of integrating it in
educational curricula and practicing it in our lives. The Messenger of
Allah (saws) said: “Bashfulness is not to be found in anything but
that it adorns it, and obscenity is not to be found in anything but that
it mars it.” [At-Tamheed (sharh al-Muwatta)]
‘Abdullah ibn Mas‘ood said: “The most wicked quality a believer may have is obscenity.” It is the most wicked of all bad morals because it makes a person unsafe (to be around) and his reactions would not be trusted.
Al-Ahnaf ibn Qays said: “Shall I tell you what the worst diseases are? They are obscenity and bad moral character.”
According to this wise man, Al-Ahnaf ibn Qays, obscenity is among the
most serious diseases to which people should assign care to treat it.
Al-Qaasimi said: “A
person’s speech mirrors his virtues and soundness of his mind.
Therefore, you should confine your speech to what is good, speak little,
and beware of repugnant language as it alienates the honorable people
from you and instead attracts the wicked ones to you.”
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